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stories biography escapes archives


Welcome ♥



Love me or hate me.
Know me, dont judge me.
I'm just a girl who lives in this ordinary world. ♥

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♥ Thursday, March 12 ♥
It is 4.30am in the morning and I'm suffering from Insomnia once again. For the past few days, i've been getting to sleep with the help of my Flu tablets(those that will cause drowsiness) and have been sleeping rather peacefully, and of course, i overslept. And I have been waking up feeling groggy.

My plan tonight was to go to sleep without popping the Flu tablets. Geez, the plan failed miserably, and i've been tossing and turning in bed for 4 friggin hours. I wanted to wake up early tomorrow to do my maths. But I guess i'll be waking up just in time for tuition. I think deep down inside, I'm feeling a lil stressed out and freaked out by the fact that the examination is just 7 weeks away. And half of my mind is telling me that there's no hope while the other half of me is trying to pick up the momentum to study but Maths is draining me of my brain juices. I need a miracle. Like seriously.

I just took the Flu tablet and i think i'm gonna knock out in 20 mins time. I dont want to sleep so un-naturally but i cant help it. Stress is slowing biting my ass away. Decided to release some stress yesterday by playing Left 4 Dead. I guess shouting in the Lan shop DO help me release the tension somehow. And i walk out of the Lan shop feeling refreshed. Its like, taking 2 hours of your time and indulge yourself in the world of fiction. Oblivious to the outside world. I guess Left 4 Dead is my official examination stress therapy. Shopping is obviously out because i end up feeling guilty, which is definitely not helping to curb my stress.
I need more productive studying. i need, i must, i must achieve.
I feel like yanking my hair out at this moment. I feel so screwed.
And i think that helping myself to release the stress is by avoiding it. And thus, i'm tryin not to study. WHICH IS NOT GOOD! i need to think of a better way.

My determination and will-power is so bloody pathetic. No wonder i can never get anywhere in life. I suck. grr! I'm so pissed with myself.

Why cant i be like Kenichi? Why cant i have that immense amount of discipline like he does? I know it is instilled in him . But WHY cant i be like that? i totally lack of it. which now separates me from him. Because he's the hardworker, i'm the sick-ass slacker. I cant help but compare myself to him. i need a slap on the face.

WAKE UP CHERYL WAKE UP!

I hope this period will end soon.
And i'm falling alseep now.

Ciaos.




left her thoughts ♥ 4:13:00 AM